Inspired by the actual EPA Pres Release partially reproduced below, Dr. Rima has a “Modest Proposal” in the satirical tradition of Johnathan Swift…
“Release date: 09/27/2010: WASHINGTON – The U.S. Environmental Protection Agency (EPA) today announced it intends to propose a rule to reduce mercury waste from dental offices. Dental amalgams, or fillings containing mercury, account for 3.7 tons of mercury discharged from dental offices each year. The mercury waste results when old mercury fillings are replaced with new ones. The mercury in dental fillings is flushed into chair-side drains and enters the waste water systems, making its way into the environment through discharges to rivers and lakes, incineration or land application of sewage sludge. Mercury released through amalgam discharges can be easily managed and prevented.
EPA expects to propose a rule next year and finalize it in 2012. Dental offices will be able to use existing technology to meet the proposed requirements. Amalgam separators can separate out 95 percent of the mercury normally discharged to the local waste treatment plant. The separator captures the mercury, which is then recycled and reused. ”
The One With The Best Songs Wins
Roger Mason won a $1000 shopping spree at our Marketplace, www.Organics4U.org, when he created the Uber Cartel vs. the Peasants of the Dawn, http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SkNj00lBDHo, by setting one of Dr. Rima’s poems to music and creating a stunning music video. Here at Natural Solutions Foundation, we believe the ones with the best songs, and the best satire and the best art wins. So here is another creation by Dr. Rima.
Take her satiric “News Item” below and turn it into a video (musical or not – that’s up to you!)
When you are finished, send the link to your creation to firstname.lastname@example.org with “HWRS” as the subject line. The Board of Trustees of the Natural Solutions Foundation will pick the most creative piece and award the winner a $500 Gift Certificate at www.Organics4U.org, with prizes of $250 to each of the next two winners. The best videos will be featured on a page on this site.
Landfill Health Program
“Release date: 09/20/2010: VOLCAN, PANAMA –Grappling with the serious problem of human repository toxic wastes, yesterday the US FDA, EPA, OSHA and WHO Joint Task Force on Toxic Humans and Their Impact on the Environment (USFSAEPAOSHAWHOJTFTHTIE) issued a Statement of Principle Report which indicates that all humans should be used as toxic waste repositories for as many toxins as possible to be stored in their bodies, starting before birth, in order to reduce the environmental stress that their release would otherwise cause on the fragile ecosystems of the planet.
Noting that depositing toxic wastes in human body compartments creating self-maintaining, self-propelled waste repository systems, the USFSAEPAOSHAWHOJTFTHTIE Report states:
1. Humans have evolved numerous detoxification pathways which allow them, unlike simpler organisms, to withstand multiple simultaneous toxic loads,
2. Total toxic load can play a serious role in the shortening of the length of time that the Human Waste Repository System (HWRS) could be expected to reduce the environmental burden
3. Humans are culturally and genetically prepared to attempt to prolong their life spans, rejecting inputs which shorten those spans or sicken them. This tendency can be countered by education and chemical alteration of thinking/reasoning potential.
4. Halides such as fluoride, coupled with sustained educational input can be used to effectively reduce such anti-social and anti-environmental tendencies.
Therefore, the USFSAEPAOSHAWHOJTFTHTIE Report recommends the following international policies:
1. All human compartments, including mouth, teeth, bones, nervous system, muscles and human-related bacterial populations (which as the ones in the gut and on the skins of HWRSs should be considered as long-term storage facilities for toxins including, but not limited to, the following classes of materials:
a. Heavy Metals
b. Organophosphate, Organophosphate and other Industrial Agriculture Compounds
c. Hydrogenated Hydrocarbons
d. Polyphenols including PCBs, BisPhenols and related compounds
e. Industrial Solvents, Effluvia and related compounds
f. Dioxin and Daughter Products
g.Unclassified Industrial Toxic Sludge and Slurries
h. Endocrine Disruptors of mixed or unclassified type
i. Antibiotics and metabolites from personal use, water contamination and food sources
k. Psychoactive Drugs and metabolites
l. Chemotherapy Drugs and their metabolites
m. Radioactive Medical and industrial waste.
2. Since, to date, potential HWRSs have been perplexingly slow to volunteer themselves and their children for inclusion in this ecologically powerful, humanitarian transnational program, it is important to create a sense of acceptance and trust in government agencies leading to two psychological and cultural outcomes:
a. Total trust in the regulatory agencies of the country and globe so that inquires and disputes are not raised by the active or future HWRSs leading to legal or public relations problems
b. Total trust in the good will of industrial actors so that food, water effluent, air quality, containers, waste management and processes will be assumed to be both advanced and safe
c. Sufficient halogen contamination (e.g., fluoride) of HWRSs nervous systems that protest or question not only appears futile, but irrelevant and unnecessary.
3. Recognizing that once a total body burden of multiple toxins has been reached in the physiology of HWRSs, functional breakdown occurs (“disease”), and recognizing further that the “treatment” of such “disease” is highly profitable to the manufacturers of the toxic wastes themselves (and of the symptom-focused “treatments” purveyed), it is important that the sense of trust engendered (see 2, a, b, c, above) extend to the “caring” illness management industry so that participation in the programs of “treatment” and “cure” will continue at a high rate.
4. All information concerning the capacity to detoxify HWRSs should be suppressed and invalidated to reduce the burden of such excreted toxic wastes on the environment.
5. Any HWRSs which succumb to the toxic loads they are so public-spiritedly bearing (that is, adopting the behavioral condition commonly referred to as “death”) will be disposed of in a way which is sensitive to the environment. Suggested methods include:
a. Multiple burials in non-biodegradable, hermetically sealable containers of manageable size (3 average weight/length HWRSs to a container offers maximum flexibility). Smaller HWRSs can be contained in greater numbers in the same containers while exceptionally bloated HWRSs may have to be assigned a container of their own or share one with a smaller than average HWRS. National agencies already partnering with the USFSAEPAOSHAWHOJTFTHTIE initiative such as FEMA (US) have begun to stock pile suitable containers at locations around that country,
b. Firing into outer space. Extraterrestrial diplomacy specialists, however, maintain that this method of HWRS disposal, while solving our own toxic environmental problems, shows us to be poor neighbors to our extraterrestrial brethren.
c. Extraterrestrial consumption by reptilian life-forms which have been known since human antiquity to consume and detoxify toxins using biological means as yet uncharacterized.
Sea monsters, for example, have been documented to consume entire sailing ships and their full complement of crew and passengers without apparent ill effect. Exceptionally large ape-like species have been documented to consume highly toxic (to human-related biosphere inhabitants) skyscrapers without obvious gastric complaint, assuming that there is, indeed a gastric system in place in these life-forms. Further study is required to confirm that hypothesis although such study is outside the remit of the Scope of Work provided for the USFSAEPAOSHAWHOJTFTHTIE.
In summary, the USFSAEPAOSHAWHOJTFTHTIE recognizes the environmental immediacy of the toxic materials waste storage and disposal problem created through current and anticipated future industrial contaminant generation and recommends
1. An accelerated program to create and utilize the toxic load-storing capacity of HWRSs and
2. A large-scale public-confidence program. The current public-confidence pilot program (Friendly Obliteration of Xenomaterials Newly Emitted Without Safety – Biological Program or “FOX NEWS – BP“) has shown itself to be highly effective so it should be increased in scope and size. For example, environmental protection agencies around the world could follow the lead of the US EPA to agree to impose filtration requirements on HWRSs whose mercury amalgam fillings are replaced with new mercury amalgam fillings.